Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Lessons in Love: Observations After 10 Years of Marriage

Sandy Malone Observations Advice After 10 Years of Marriage
Photo: Getty Images
Owner of Weddings in Vieques, a destination-wedding planning company off the coast of Puerto Rico, Sandy Malone has helped countless couples plan their big day since 2007. Along with being a pro-planner, Sandy has been happily married for 10 years to Bill Malone, who is also her business partner. In fact, today, marks the couple's 10th anniversary! In honor of their milestone, Sandy is looking back at the most important things she's learned about married life over the past decade — engaged couples should take note!
1. Marriage doesn't change you as a couple — it just makes you better. Where one of you is weak, the other is strong. Together you can become unbeatable. The expression "power couple" doesn't only apply to celebrities and politicians.
2. The annoying things your fiancé does before you get married, he or she will probably still be doing 10 years later as your husband or wife. I still put my shirts in the hamper inside out. Bill still forgets to turn off the alarm when he walks the dog in the morning.
3. Our teamwork gets better every year. Our silent eye signals and private language have expanded 10-fold and now he can understand me when I speak in pronouns.
4. We all age. Some more gracefully than others, but it's inevitable. Appreciating each other's growth and maturity makes getting older a beautiful thing. Learning to joke about it makes it tolerable.
5. Family doesn't go away, it grows. Now we have six grandchildren (from his previous marriage) and every one of them is a blessing.
6. Friends come and go. Your spouse is always there. No matter what. If one of you has to cut somebody loose, the other one holds the scissors to cut that cord.
See More: Bigger Weddings Lead to Happier Marriages, a New Study Says!
7. Your husband or wife will always take your side — even when you're wrong. That doesn't mean you don't have to listen to him or her later when you talk privately about the issue.
8. Your spouse's health will become more important to you than your own — which is why you both have to feel that way. You are each other's best and only advocate when the chips are down.
9. Respect grows over the years in a successful marriage. You brag more about your spouse's successes than your own, and you suffer his or her failures as if they were your own. When your husband or wife hurts, you hurt. When you grieve, you grieve together.
10. I fall more in love with my husband every single day of our lives. Every day he does something wonderful and amazing that I don't always take the time to appreciate with words. But I should.

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